There was a point in my journey of survival when I began to get too comfortable with the term I can’t, for in the beginning of my journey, I couldn’t. I became too comfortable with my wife taking care of me, I became so consumed with my own afflictions that I became blind to hers, which were born from mine. When you give much of yourself to give aid to another, one can become sick themselves while doing so, for who will tend to their needs? Anxiety, a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event, or something with an uncertain outcome. My wife’s anxiety stemmed from not only my needs, but the needs of others as well, as she looks after everyone but herself. She takes care of the kids, the grandkids, the needy husband, the bills, and the upkeep of our home. One day I was entertaining thoughts of how I was going to make my wife’s life less stressful, how I was going to make her situation more suitable for the betterment of her health. As I contemplated on how I was going to make this come to fruition, I received a phone call from a good friend of mine, Derrick Jennings.
Derrick: What’s up Dame?
Me: Nothing, sitting here trying to get out of bed.
Derrick: Dame, you know that I have nothing but love and respect for you, but as your true friend I have to express my concerns on how you are going about your recovery. Your wife has done her part, and the Lord continues to do his, it is now time for you, to do yours!
Me: (slight pause) You do not know how much I needed to hear that, especially coming from someone that I love and respect. I appreciate your honesty, but I am going to have to call you back.
Me: Because I have to take care of my wife now!
“The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife, to her husband.”
1 Corinthians 7:14